Author Topic: Feelings of Being Controlled & Dominated  (Read 5507 times)

mr-patrick

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Feelings of Being Controlled & Dominated
« on: August 07, 2023 »
Hi John,

I have been working on clearing feelings based around the Power centre, and wanted to ask for your thoughts around a particular situation.

Since childhood I have been aware of emotions of anger and rage. These emotions seem to arise whenever I feel taken advantage of, used or invaded. It was not until I read DEEP CLEARING that I realised that these feelings originated from being bought up in a strict religious household. At that time I felt ignored, helpless and restricted without any say in my own life.

I now realise that this energy has been attracting similar (if not the same) type of relationships into my life. At 35 the energy is currently manifesting in the form of a narcissistic and overbearing boss, the type of individual that I believed I had "escaped" from just last year.

My thoughts are that this is something to be processed and learnt from, and that setting boundaries or regaining my own power in the form of "standing my ground" might be necessary. I recognise that the feelings of being dominated and manipulated need to be felt and processed also.

My question is how do I set boundaries and protect myself without getting carried away by the anger and rage I feel. Any time I attempt to set boundaries, the emotions of anger and rage come up, my voice starts to quiver, and the urge to cry comes up. How can I avoid being swept away by the feelings of being used and taken advantage of AND set the necessary boundaries to protect myself in the moment?

Thanks again
« Last Edit: August 07, 2023 by mr-patrick »

John Ruskan

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Re: Feelings of Being Controlled & Dominated
« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2023 »
You've got the correct understanding. If you are unable to assert your boundaries without an emotional reaction, it means it's too soon and it probably will not go well. You are probably not objective. I would advise working more on your own to clear the feelings or getting with an EC Facilitator for a few sessions since you appear to be having strong feelings before engaging in a confrontation.