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THE EMOTIONAL CLEARING PROCESS / emotions around being disrespected
« on: April 08, 2022 »
Hiya John, I'm new to the forum but have been familiar with emotional clearing for a few months now. First off, I want to express my gratitude and let you know it seems to be helping me immeasurably. I found both of your books on Amazon and I'm about 3/4 of the way through deep clearing after having finished emotional clearing. A lot of what you preach is brand new to me; I had always thought of myself as spiritual but you seem to have humbled me! It's really refreshing to read such detailed content on such a niche topic, you're clearly an expert.
I wanted to ask you about the emotions around being disrespected. Since my mid/late teens, I've been quite a confrontational person in the sense that I did not allow people to disrespect me in any way. I always saw this as a positive trait to have and it allowed me to bathe in the confidence that came from knowing I didn't take any shit. I felt I needed to have this mindset to be successful in my profession of acting, where everywhere you look there's someone trying to out-shine you or even tear you down for their chance in the spotlight. Anyway, I eventually found this way of living was not sustainable at all, it made me feel strong (in the moment), but I ended up becoming a toxic individual that people didn't enjoy being around. It also zapped me of all my energy as you can imagine. I would literally not let any little violation (or at least my perception of one) slide. After reading your books, I now know I was trying to avoid the feeling of being a pushover at all costs. I have a very distorted way of dealing with people with egos, it seems. The feeling I got when picturing even the smallest of insults being aimed at me was so painful that I had completely block it out through firing back. I truly want to heal myself of this toxic trait and I believe I have got the ball rolling by becoming aware of it. I suppose my question is, have you ever experienced anything similar to this and if so, how did you transcend it? I am finding it really difficult to supress the urge to act out the anger that comes, will that surpass eventually? Is there a middle ground when it comes to acting out the anger? For example, fighting your corner in a way that isn't obviously confrontational?
Any other advice on this would mean a lot to me John. Thank you so much
I wanted to ask you about the emotions around being disrespected. Since my mid/late teens, I've been quite a confrontational person in the sense that I did not allow people to disrespect me in any way. I always saw this as a positive trait to have and it allowed me to bathe in the confidence that came from knowing I didn't take any shit. I felt I needed to have this mindset to be successful in my profession of acting, where everywhere you look there's someone trying to out-shine you or even tear you down for their chance in the spotlight. Anyway, I eventually found this way of living was not sustainable at all, it made me feel strong (in the moment), but I ended up becoming a toxic individual that people didn't enjoy being around. It also zapped me of all my energy as you can imagine. I would literally not let any little violation (or at least my perception of one) slide. After reading your books, I now know I was trying to avoid the feeling of being a pushover at all costs. I have a very distorted way of dealing with people with egos, it seems. The feeling I got when picturing even the smallest of insults being aimed at me was so painful that I had completely block it out through firing back. I truly want to heal myself of this toxic trait and I believe I have got the ball rolling by becoming aware of it. I suppose my question is, have you ever experienced anything similar to this and if so, how did you transcend it? I am finding it really difficult to supress the urge to act out the anger that comes, will that surpass eventually? Is there a middle ground when it comes to acting out the anger? For example, fighting your corner in a way that isn't obviously confrontational?
Any other advice on this would mean a lot to me John. Thank you so much