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THE EMOTIONAL CLEARING PROCESS / Connection
« on: March 06, 2022 »
Dear John,
I read your last book, it's great. I started with a more intense meditation practice with the light and Earth energy from EC. For the last three years I have been constantly focused on the observer. When I do not meditate during the day I am constantly present in the body.
A lot has happened in my experience over the last two years.Everything I believed in was collapsed. Starting with my job, relationships, money. There was so much fears, pain, guilt, shame.
What i realize after everything that in one moment my consciousness is open and i'am free from suffering, there is only present moment.
Sometimes that openness is so great that I do not feel myself, i feel only connection with everything. I cant describe that. That opening happens and when I work with people in my workshops (consciouss relationships, parenting, communication...).
What distracts me from the present moment is a black very heavy cloud that I would visually describe as something descending on me and my consciousness returning to a traumatized state. I cant breath from that heavines, somethimes is very hard to be present with that.
It happens when I am with my child as if he is awakening the old trauma in me. Тhe situation in this relationship where I am a single mother looks like my childhood and awakens the same emotional atmosphere.
He tells me that he feels lonely (need connection) and to sit with him, but it is very difficult for me to connect with him in that moments, because and i feel ashame of that to be in connection with other.I am aware that is some part of me who leaves in separation and that is some trauma, fear of realtionship. I' am now aware, that was suptile follow me all my life.
What I feel physically is pressure on the left side of the body, mostly in the lower abdomen and left hip (feminine side) and heals me down in suffering and pain.It also changes my perception of becoming the person I used to be tied to the past, I feel angry to men, unworthy, dont seen etc..Same emotional patterns and thoughts. Like body pattern to feel in that way.At some point I will realize that I am not that and the heavines seems to leave me, the energy in my body moves again and i'am ok to be present with my child and people, but i feel like need to close again.This happening with my close people, especialy men.
Can you tell me something about open and close inner dinamic? Is that separate self?
In which energetic centar is feeling of trust, intimacy and connection? Is second center?
How can I find out where the energy centers are on the body described in your new book?
Thank you so much
I read your last book, it's great. I started with a more intense meditation practice with the light and Earth energy from EC. For the last three years I have been constantly focused on the observer. When I do not meditate during the day I am constantly present in the body.
A lot has happened in my experience over the last two years.Everything I believed in was collapsed. Starting with my job, relationships, money. There was so much fears, pain, guilt, shame.
What i realize after everything that in one moment my consciousness is open and i'am free from suffering, there is only present moment.
Sometimes that openness is so great that I do not feel myself, i feel only connection with everything. I cant describe that. That opening happens and when I work with people in my workshops (consciouss relationships, parenting, communication...).
What distracts me from the present moment is a black very heavy cloud that I would visually describe as something descending on me and my consciousness returning to a traumatized state. I cant breath from that heavines, somethimes is very hard to be present with that.
It happens when I am with my child as if he is awakening the old trauma in me. Тhe situation in this relationship where I am a single mother looks like my childhood and awakens the same emotional atmosphere.
He tells me that he feels lonely (need connection) and to sit with him, but it is very difficult for me to connect with him in that moments, because and i feel ashame of that to be in connection with other.I am aware that is some part of me who leaves in separation and that is some trauma, fear of realtionship. I' am now aware, that was suptile follow me all my life.
What I feel physically is pressure on the left side of the body, mostly in the lower abdomen and left hip (feminine side) and heals me down in suffering and pain.It also changes my perception of becoming the person I used to be tied to the past, I feel angry to men, unworthy, dont seen etc..Same emotional patterns and thoughts. Like body pattern to feel in that way.At some point I will realize that I am not that and the heavines seems to leave me, the energy in my body moves again and i'am ok to be present with my child and people, but i feel like need to close again.This happening with my close people, especialy men.
Can you tell me something about open and close inner dinamic? Is that separate self?
In which energetic centar is feeling of trust, intimacy and connection? Is second center?
How can I find out where the energy centers are on the body described in your new book?
Thank you so much